Indelible

a personal blog

Tag: worrying

Mardy Monday

Well, what else could I call it? I love mondays, as a rule. But today is proving to be the exception. I spent a bit of a restless night. I remember I was dreaming something or other than involved David Tennent. Can’t remember what it was sadly. I kept waking up every couple of hours with coughing, which was not fun. My ribs hurt now.

As I didn’t get up until 10 o’ clock again, it feels like it was a very short day. It’s a bank holiday so there was no post. P and L went for a walk up the hill. I wish I could have gone with them, it’s been a while since I walked up that way, and I love getting to the top and seeing the sea. They didn’t get all the way up though as Morgan spotted them, from where he was playing in the Conrah field. So he joined them. Our cats really love it here, so much more than where we used to live in Merthyr Tydfil.

Last week was rather melancholy, talking of Merthyr. For some reason, I couldn’t get our late and still dear cat Bruce out of my ind. He was killed on the road, just two weeks after we moved here to Aberystwyth. I had a fit of tears halfway through last week, thinking of him. And then our hen, Ellie, died for no reason at all that we could see. It was a particularly cold night and the theory is that she didn’t go back into the henhouse that night when the others did. Annie is always first in as she doesn’t care for mealworms and she likes to make sure that she always gets the top left hand corner in the house. There’s usually one or two that are late to climb up the little ladder into their house, and Ellie is one of them. We think that she loitered for so long outside that she was overcome by the cold, as it got down to -7°C, and she fell asleep outside. Or she was the first out of the house too early in the morning and died that way.

So, all in all, it was a bit of a sad week. I managed to pick an argument with P on our wedding anniversary, which was also not fun. I don’t know what happened: part of it was that I was feeling a little crowded as I’m used to being on my own most of the time. But it wasn’t all that. I don’t know what it was about, but got the week off to a less than delightful start.

And so, here I am on the last week of the year feeling like something the cat chewed up and spat out. I suppose that, as the saying goes, things can only get better. Hmmm. I think I’ll not count my chickens.

Things That Are

I like to give my bits of nonsense titles from things I’m listening to. Tonight it’s “Mara” by Runrig and I’m listening to the track “Things That Are”. Today is nearly over and its been a short day, one way or another. Probably helped by me not getting up until 10 o’ clock this morning. P, bless him, let me sleep as I’m having some broken nights, thanks to a nasty sore throat and a cough that is driving me crackers.

It really is not fair. I had my routine ‘flu vaccination as usual, last month. Then a week later, I had a swine ‘flu vaccination. Well, I had to really, what with having diabetes and being prone to pneumonia as well as bronchitis like you wouldn’t believe. (Last time I had it, it lasted for six months.) I thought I’d be fine, just as I have been for the past three years since I’ve been having the ‘flu vaccination.

But put it this way: the ‘flu one is Constable Odo and the Bajoran security team on Deep Space Nine, while the swine ‘flu one is Commander Worf and the Starfleet security folks. I had a sore throat: nothing major, just a bit of a nuisance really. But the swine ‘flu vaccination went into overdrive and started lobbing photon torpedoes at it. Then the Bajorans got into the act and running around the corridors, shooting anything that moves. The result is that I feel like something the cats dragged in and the cough has bypassed bronchitis, but is having much the same effect. In that I can’t sleep lying down and have to prop myself up with lots of cushions and pillows. I’m drinking so much water that I expect my kidneys will be going down for the third time pretty soon. It’s a nightmare.

The rotten thing is, P and L are home for two weeks and now I’m not in a fit state to go anywhere with them. I had to make things worse by looking it up on the ‘net, which is always fatal. By the time I’d looked at half a dozen sites, I was convinced that I was going to get ME at the very least. But then I gave myself a good talking to and realized that, while lots of disgruntled people rushed to post their woes on the ‘net, no one had posted who were actually happy with the vaccinations. So I’m not going to worry. Comparing it to Gulf War syndrome is not going to give me the colly wobbles. Noserieebob. Not at all. Hah! Who am I kidding? I’m scared, of course as this vaccination does seem to have been rushed out. But nothing was gained by worrying. Anyway, I have an essay on Peter Pan to be getting on with, so I don’t have time for worrying about some vaccination I had over a month ago. No matter what it’s doing to me.

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